One Year Alcohol Free and This is What I’ve Learned
One year ago, I made the decision to stop drinking alcohol. Not because I had hit rock bottom, and not because I drank everyday. I had just reached a point where alcohol was taking more than it was giving.
The moment I started questioning alcohol
I didn’t drink at home. I only indulged on a Saturday night out once in a while. Because drinking socially is so normalised in British culture, I’d never really questioned it. However, my 40th birthday changed everything. For a month, I went out twice a week and drank a few drinks more than what is considered safe for my health. However, here in the UK, drinking too much is normalised. If you go out on a Saturday night it seems like everyone is drinking to their heart’s content and having a blast. Yes, that’s what I did too. I enjoyed the banter and dancing all night. But during that birthday month of celebrating everything changed.
When I reached 40 I didn’t have that dread of feeling old, I felt like I was stepping into my confidence. I felt good in myself. Then the day after the night before, I felt tired, stressed and as the month progressed with more champagne, cocktails and birthday shots, I found myself feeling quite down. In the final week, the hangover had mounted to seven days of me not feeling my best. Friday night came and I was out again, I took a sip of my cocktail and instantly I felt better. This did not feel like a good sign. For the first time, I questioned, is alcohol controlling me?
I know that some of you will say it was the ‘hair of the dog’ but for me it was a clear message to stop drinking alcohol. The decision initiated a huge reflection of what alcohol was bringing into my life and whether the stress was outweighing the joy. I never expected that quitting drinking was going to turn my life around so much, however, initially the impact was mixed.
What changed socially
Of course, at first I continued to go out with the same friends I was going out having a few drinks with, apart from now that I had stopped drinking, the nights out were not as much fun. I realised that drinking was suppressing my my emotions and warping my perception of how I felt around people. Previously, the crass comments and banter had washed over me like water off a duck’s back, but now that I had stopped drinking, I became much more aware of how I felt about them. It was quite a revelation. The people around me hadn't suddenly changed, but my experience of being around them had.
As time passed, the friends I went out drinking with faded away. There was a period where I felt a bit of a gap, but at the same time the space felt peaceful and I was finding more fulfilling things to do with my time. The surprising thing was, that I was naturally beginning to meet more people who don’t drink or just enjoy one or two drinks on a night out, and of course I still have fun with some friends who drink more. Nevertheless, what I thought everyone was doing, actually no longer feels like the majority. It’s interesting that I realised that getting tipsy on a night out was a bubble not necessarily based on reality. There are so many bubbles similar to this.
New friendships have been formed, and I feel more connected to people whose lifestyles and interests align with mine. I feel like I’m my authentic self and I’ve met so many new people whose idea of having a good time doesn’t revolve around getting drunk. I feel so much more relaxed and confident in myself as I choose how I spend my time more intentionally. In fact, after a year of not drinking, the thought of going to a bar seems increasingly mundane and a place I’d soon want to escape…
The health benefits I didn’t expect
Another benefit I have noted, is my health and fitness. My trip to Rishikesh, India to do my Yoga Teacher Training was the catalyst for this. Whilst here, I ate lots of vegetables and in Goa, more vegetables and fish. Lots of water and rose petal tea. I did yoga everyday and whilst in Goa walked at least five kilometres along the beautiful, long sandy beach. I lost a stone in weight and when I returned to England, instead of putting the weight back on, I found it so easy to maintain. When I used to drink, it wasn’t just the empty calories of alcohol (a cocktail contains between 400 and 700 calories), but also the salty foods the next day that added 1000s of calories to my week. Everything feels so much lighter when you stop drinking alcohol.
What one year alcohol alcohol free has taught me
One unexpected benefit was having far more motivation and consistency. I found myself putting more energy into my business, applying advice which had previously been lost and showing up everyday. Looking back, alcohol wasn’t just costing me a Sunday, it was costing me momentum. On social media, people have loved following my journey on LinkedIn. What I have learned on my journey seems to inspire people and I’ve had more enquiries to help people to stop drinking alcohol. The right people have been really supportive. Additionally, quitting alcohol has allowed me to work with people from a place of awareness, genuine experience and authenticity.
If you are reading this because you’ve started questioning your own relationship with alcohol, you don’t necessarily label yourself as having a problem. Sometimes simply asking whether alcohol is still adding more to your life than it’s taking away is enough to start a change.
For me, stopping drinking began as a decision after my 40th birthday. A year later, it has changed far more than I expected - my health, friendships, my motivation, my work and perhaps most importantly, how I feel in myself. If you would like support changing your relationship with alcohol, you’re welcome to get in touch.
Stephanie
